Epistemic status: Speculation. An unholy union of evo psych, introspection, random stuff I happen to observe & hear about, and thinking. Done on a highly charged topic. Caveat emptor!

oh boy

archive: https://archive.is/uOP4y

  • BernieDoesIt
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    6 months ago

    Rachel loved to watch Blake knead bread. She would do it for hours if she could. Blake’s big, strong hands could knead the dough harder than anyone else, and that’s why his loaves were always longer than anyone else’s.

    • BernieDoesIt
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      36 months ago

      “Chez Mixte?” laughed Marcie over the phone. “More like Chex Mix! Look, the bumpkins in Pastryton might think it’s convenient for families to pick up their men’s and women’s pastries from the same shop, but you and I both know that it’s just not worth the risk. What if a woman accidentally makes a dainty religieuse with masculine dough made by a man? It would be chaos! Who knows what would happen? I certainly wouldn’t want to be there to find out.”

      • BernieDoesIt
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        6 months ago

        Suddenly Blake’s vocabulary lesson was interrupted by doubt. “But wait! Why would Rachel care about how I feel about her?” he thought. He couldn’t think of a reason why it would matter to her at all. Still, this was the best plan he had, so he went back to trying to memorize what the word “happy” means. He thought that would be a good one to impress her with.

        • BernieDoesIt
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          26 months ago

          “Just try it!” Rachel pleaded. “You might like it.” It wasn’t really a test, but Rachel knew it kind of was.

          Blake knew that he would have to adapt to some of Rachel’s big city ways if he wanted to live with her forever, kind of like two vampires but without the blood and coffins and stuff. But still living together, just like vampires do.

          “Alright, I’ll give it a try.” He got a mouthful and squished it around. It was creamy, with a touch of salt. He swallowed, and a smile grew on his face. “Wow! I really can’t believe it’s not butter!”

          “You must never use this in a croissant,” Rachel said very seriously.

          Blake pinky sweared.