When you think MURDER, think MARCUS MUNITIONS!

  • @Zip2@feddit.uk
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    305 months ago

    They’ll be put in schools next.

    90,585 days without a national health service.

    For fucks sake America.

    • BougieBirdie
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      135 months ago

      The bullet machines will be for the campus law enforcement, the tots won’t get to use them.

      But they will get to try out the tech in cafeterias, so that they’ll be more conveniently denied a free lunch.

      • @barsquid@lemmy.world
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        155 months ago

        Myopic of them. We’ve seen cops respond to school shooters by cowering. The only thing that can stop a bad tot with a gun is a good tot with a gun.

    • @RaoulDook@lemmy.world
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      65 months ago

      I doubt so, since those vending machines require a face scan and ID verification for proof of age. Also those are two things that would make me decline to use such a machine.

  • @BlueMonday1984
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    225 months ago

    Tenner says we’re seeing them in GTA 6 for obvious reasons

  • kbal
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    194 months ago

    I wonder what kind of training it takes to become capable of deciding that the thing your ammunition vending machine project really needs is Artificial Intelligence. Does the NRA have an MBA program?

  • @V0ldek
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    194 months ago

    A fantastic day for capitalism!

      • @Soyweiser
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        64 months ago

        I’m sure we’ll do this all again soon enough.

  • @Soyweiser
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    135 months ago

    Well time to build a large golden statue of a shopkeeper.

  • @El_guapazo@lemmy.world
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    124 months ago

    It’s harder to buy alcohol than use the vending machine. Where I live, I can’t buy alcohol at the liquor store before noon on Sunday or on holidays. But I can stock for a school shooting?

    Puritan America values strike again.

    • @Soyweiser
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      114 months ago

      Puritan America values strike again.

      Just got an acausal message from the future. 2025 will be shocking, we have seen nothing yet. And sadly I don’t think we in Europe have it in us to do a D-day to save the USA from the fascists.

  • @swlabr
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    4 months ago

    I wonder what initial conditions spawned this fractal of bad. This Mandel-rot. This Sier-stink-ski

  • @shalafi@lemmy.world
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    25 months ago

    I don’t know why anyone would use these. I just got 500 rounds of .45 for $.23/ea. LOL, they’re probably $2/ea. in a vending machine.

  • southsamurai
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    -85 months ago

    You do know that murder is only illegal killing, right?

    With machines that require the hoops you jump through that those idiot boxes require, only an idiot would use them to buy ammo for a murder. Also, an idiot for paying that much for ammo.

    Me, I only perform legal killings, so I can take out an equity loan and buy the entire machine out! Yay!

    Yay?

    • @FermiEstimate@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      154 months ago

      You’re forgetting mass shooters, i.e., the people who don’t care if they’re identified or if they’re getting a good price. Safe to say they’re not worried about their credit rating if the plan is to take on a SWAT team in 20 minutes.

      • southsamurai
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        44 months ago

        Man, I have to break this to you, but if someone wants it fast, ammo from one of these machines is the last place they’d go. You can get ammo faster at a gun store. In and out, five minutes if the place isn’t busy.

        The only realistic use case for these machines is people out hunting and wanting to only stop in one place on the way home, or as close to camp as possible when on a longer trip.

        Guns are harder to get than ammo. Shit, if you shoot regularly, you probably know someone that reloads, and can get a bucket full of ammo at a time, no questions asked.

        It’s funny though, the idea of someone planning on cooking off a few hundred rounds, obtaining a rifle and magazines, getting all dressed up to go and then, “damn, I forgot to load any of these, better stop at the piggly wiggly and get ammo, or no mass mayhem for me!”

        Okay, the mayhem and killing part isn’t funny, but the idea that a mass shooter wild use one of these machines is.

        • @FermiEstimate@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          74 months ago

          Ah, right, I guess that’s why other vending machines never caught on. Why spend $2 on a Snickers at work when a quick trip to the grocery store can get you candy for way less?

          What you’re overlooking this time is vending machines sell convenience, not just single-serving portions. The fact that very few customers really need ammo without leaving the store/mall is indeed why this is a questionable business model and not just a sketchy one.

          I’m puzzled, though, by the belief that hunters are more likely to make overpriced, impulse purchases of ammo than mass shooters. I’m even less inclined to buy that than ammo from a vending machine.

          • @selfA
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            104 months ago

            I’m puzzled, though, by the belief that hunters are more likely to make overpriced, impulse purchases of ammo than mass shooters. I’m even less inclined to buy that than ammo from a vending machine.

            hunters and chuds are the two demographics most likely to waste their money on expensive ammo that supposedly kills quicker, usually due to some patented hydrostatic horseshit that doesn’t work (but they paid a former FBI agent to claim it does). there’s little chance this stupid fucking unguarded box supposedly secured by AI will have anything that expensive in it though.

            speaking of chuds:

            You do know that murder is only illegal killing, right?

            Me, I only perform legal killings, so I can take out an equity loan and buy the entire machine out! Yay!

            It’s funny though, the idea of someone planning on cooking off a few hundred rounds, obtaining a rifle and magazines, getting all dressed up to go and then, “damn, I forgot to load any of these, better stop at the piggly wiggly and get ammo, or no mass mayhem for me!”

            Okay, the mayhem and killing part isn’t funny, but the idea that a mass shooter wild use one of these machines is.

            coming in here fucking salivating over the idea of people getting killed with guns (but oops tee hee it’s ok if you pretend it’s a shitty joke every time) was a fucking mistake if you’re presenting as a reasonable gun owner, and it’s painfully obvious this is the schtick you use to start fucking exhausting internet debates with equally fucking exhausting neoliberals. spare me that bullshit.

            • @o7___o7OP
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              4 months ago

              here’s little chance this stupid fucking unguarded box supposedly secured by AI will have anything that expensive in it though.

              You have to wonder how much of this is just weird nerds reifying their scifi/video game fantasies. This can’t be a valid business strategy.

              • @selfA
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                74 months ago

                it’s absolutely the same fash assholes who claim Bioshock as an expression of rather than a scathing parody of their awful fucking objectivist worldview, and have spent decades normalizing doing the exact same shit that got Andrew Ryan’s stupid fucking head caved in with a golf club

    • @skillissuer@discuss.tchncs.de
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      54 months ago

      i don’t think that “one crime at a time” applies there. what’s stopping a school shooter from just stealing shit from that idiot box