I lowkey believe the vast majority of monosexual people are actually bisexual people who have decided for one reason or another they will only date one gender.
Agreed. Honestly believe that no one is truly entirely hetero or homosexual. I mean, either of those existing is predicated on the existence of a strict gender binary. If gender is a spectrum, sexuality necessarily has to be as well.
I’m bisexual and pretty open about it… whenever men have had a few drinks around me and I mention it, so many start telling me all the men they are attracted to.
It’s a really funny phenomenon
Personally and from a pragmatic viewpoint, I don’t think it’s the vast majority, at least not based on my experience and assuming we’re both using the same nonscientific and imprecise definitions.
Having said that, I am fully on board with the idea that more people are somewhere in between on the spectrum of sexuality than most of us realize or recognize, and that far fewer of us are at the extreme ends (i.e. 100% fully hetero, 100% fully homo) than the average person assumes.
At issue here, for me, is recognizing that sexuality is (or can be) extremely complicated. It’s a situation where you can be almost comically pedantic and precise, taking things to the absurd, and easily make the claim that nobody is “monosexual”. There are so many factors to consider. Peoples’ presentation doesn’t necessarily correlate to their actual innate orientation. People’s sexuality can, and not infrequently, does change over the course of their lifetime. Those are just two examples.
I think a big part of my comfort with describing it as a vast majority is because I have an expansive definition. From what I’m given to understand, most people think of a kinsey 1 as het and a kinsey 5 as gay, but those are both clearly bi for me
the whole “innate v.s. choice” dichotomy is toxic. claim it’s a choice, and society will force people to “choose” differently. insist that it’s innate and all those people you’re alluding to will conclude from their first sexual encounters that they could never choose to enjoy a different type of encounter.
It’s certainly more complicated than the dichotomy makes it out to be.
If that is the case, then I’ve made that decision unknowingly from my own self
How much time have you spent considering your sexuality, and when did you last consider it? I suspect a lot of people chose a sexuality a long time ago under significant social pressure and don’t have a great memory of it because there was kind of a lot going on at the time.
I don’t know if I’m representative at all of the general population, and I swear I’m not trying to be an aha! guy here, but I do ponder this subject every other day or so. Maybe it is my exposure to the online queer/trans spaces, or in part my upbringing (among my parents’ friends were many gay couples), but it’s frequently on my mind. Is that something you ask yourself ? I do an exercise : I peruse the female form, and I strain to imagine the same individual as a man. Over time I’ve gotten quite good at this and it challenged my historic view of gender pretty effectively. I dropped thinking of individuals as women or men first, which is how the world was built in my brain from early on (can’t say why really). Ultimately, men do nothing for me, carnally speaking. I remember this Woody Allen (?) quote where he said bi folk have twice as much chances to get laid at any given party. I can find any person charming, including men, but that’s from an interpersonal point of view, and it doesn’t seem to extend to physical attraction. I’m afraid I find the mere thought repulsive.
If it was a choice, don’t you think I’d try it? I’m not getting much luck on the other side!
But that(sexuality in general) being a choice would make life much more easier. Instead of a current method of just having to accept it, no matter how bad hand was dealt.
Like being gay in a country with strong religious influence can be a death sentence. Even in more liberal or accepting culture, there are still going to be difficulties. Or being Ace, while not a death sentence, is a guaranteed way to have relationship difficulties throughout life. Or even as simple as being a woman with too high libido is going to branded as a slut or a guy with not high enough libido is not man.
Basically anything too far off the basic or stereotypical representation of any aspect related to sex is going to guarantee issues.
While yeah it shouldn’t be that way, in reality it is and having the ability to choose or easily change some aspects would be rather useful skill.
Disclaimer: i don’t have anything against sexual minorities, as after saying that i usually get lumped up into the same group who thinks conversion camps are a good idea. The idea likely stems from personal issues and seeing the benefit of that idea.
I just can’t understand why even discussing this idea is such a taboo subject.
(sorry if this posts twice phone is going sideways) My life would be so much easier if I could choose not to be trans, or choose to have anything more than my very specific attractions. I think I’d probably go for it honestly, or maybe take a break sometimes, it’s exhausting and lonely
I would most definitely go for it myself as well and my problems aren’t even that severe.
Stay strong, hopefully it get better in the future.
If that was the case no one would choose to be LGBT+ because it would have a degree of difficulty and if it’s purely a choice and not biological, why would you? There’s no material benefit to it.
I can only read such a sentiment as being anti-lgbt. Having the ability to ‘choose’ would be horrible, because it implies we ultimately should not exist.
Fair point, not many would make relationships more difficult just for fun. Those can be difficult enough already.
Just to clarify, i am not against lgbt, neither do i think that someone shouldn’t exist. Well maybe except rapists and murders or fascist, but that’s besides the point. It’s just form personal issues and no hatred towards others, just myself.
Question, is there a level of gayness that cannot be surpassed? You know like the speed of light.
Samwell is peak gayness.
Dude knows what he likes. Respect.
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