Have you considered getting a convertible?

You can fucking what?

I don’t know what math you’re using but 20 miles is 32.2 km

I’m sorry what?

Do you still have internet up there?

Same way I felt when I first heard Putin’s voice. It was deeper in my head.

In the winter you can trek through the arctic on the ice sheets to Svalbard, which is in Europe

The elderly and disabled will not be their biggest client base.

Just make sure to learn some Chinese as well

I have 3 monitors, what am I?

It’s probably wild and grows almonds

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Barney’s magic ringtone

The rains have ceased, and we have been graced with another beautiful day. But you are not here to see it

I made a PowerPoint presentation to convince them to let me play monster hunter when I was 13.

They let me.

Sounds plausible, but I’m gonna stick with my theory that someone stole the rest of their bones

Ok but wtf happened to the femur on the top image?

I know a man who became a grandfather at 34. He had a daughter at 16 and she had a kid at 18.

It was raw. My grandpa loved it though.

That’s fucking brilliant