For thursday’s sentencing the us government indicated they would be happy with a 40-50 prison sentence, and in the list of reasons they cite there’s this gem:

  1. Bankman-Fried’s effective altruism and own statements about risk suggest he would be likely to commit another fraud if he determined it had high enough “expected value”. They point to Caroline Ellison’s testimony in which she said that Bankman-Fried had expressed to her that he would “be happy to flip a coin, if it came up tails and the world was destroyed, as long as if it came up heads the world would be like more than twice as good”. They also point to Bankman-Fried’s “own ‘calculations’” described in his sentencing memo, in which he says his life now has negative expected value. “Such a calculus will inevitably lead him to trying again,” they write.

Turns out making it a point of pride that you have the morality of an anime villain does not endear you to prosecutors, who knew.

Bonus: SBF’s lawyers’ list of assertions for asking for a shorter sentence includes this hilarious bit reasoning:

They argue that Bankman-Fried would not reoffend, for reasons including that “he would sooner suffer than bring disrepute to any philanthropic movement.”

  • @sinedpick
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    8 months ago

    Holy FUCKING shit this cannot be real. No. He could not have written this.

    sbf plans for post-ftx

    My estimation of SBF as a wretch just fuckin plummeted.

    • @Soyweiser
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      278 months ago

      ‘Come out against the woke agenda’

      I’m reminded of the person on twitter who went ‘Wonder when his sex crimes come out’ after Russell Brand rebranded as a conspiracy rightwinger. Note: This tweet was made before his sex crimes came out.

    • @mountainriver
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      218 months ago

      Notably missing: grabbing a couple of millions and run of to a non extradition country.

      He is so sure he can get out on top that running away doesn’t even hit his brainstorm top 19 list. He doesn’t write the list on paper and burn it later, because for it to backfire he would need to fail.

      Insane confidence man.

      • @Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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        78 months ago

        Might have been trying to avoid creating a situation where his lawyers are legally obligated to go against him, which I believe they would be if they knew he was planning on running. Though I could be wrong.

        • @acausal_masochist
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          88 months ago

          That would show a level of foresight we’ve never really seen from him, but ultimately no one knows.

    • @selfMA
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      158 months ago

      ah, it’s always fun when the quiet part out loud CONFIDENTIAL.docx leaks. this sub-mediocre rich little jackass really did convince himself all he needed to do was control the narrative and flood Twitter with nonsense and he’d come out of this an unscathed alt-right grifter. what’s fucking amazing is that he still tried a bunch of these tactics (specifically #15 and a lot of the ones throwing shade on the bankruptcy team) even though the prosecution had this document the entire time

      • David GerardMA
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        138 months ago

        the sentencing is in five and a half hours and i can’t wait for SBF to try to get up and just explain one more time

        • @selfMA
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          178 months ago

          if my real-life friends were cooler, I’d have already arranged a watch party, drinking game, and post-sentencing celebratory cocktails

          fuck it, we’re doing cocktails

          The SBF

          • fill a highball glass to 2/3rds with ice and apple cider
          • float a shot of Skrewball peanut butter whiskey on top
          • to commemorate SBF’s long history of bad decisions, garnish with a serving of your choice of citrus-flavored THC drinkable
          • don’t actually do the above step you will throw up in front of your disappointed family
          • @swlabr
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            8 months ago

            Here’s my cocktail suggestion:

            50 Shades (Sam Bankman) Fried:

            Ingredients:

            • 50 different liquors/liqueurs, as many different densities and colours as possible

            Equipment:

            • Transparent cylindrical urn with spigot

            Steps:

            1. Sort the ingredients in decreasing order or liquid density.
            2. Pour 1/50th of the container capacity of each liquid in order into container, slowly and carefully to retain layers.

            (Do not actually make this)

          • @blakestaceyMA
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            78 months ago

            I am having an iced coffee with oat milk — a café oat lait, if you will.

          • Mii
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            108 months ago

            The fucking comments on the live chat, lol.

            I’d like to see him a free man. With his skill-set think of the contribution he could make

            I would actually like to see him to less but use his knowledge to help other exchanges and crypto whales

            ​​Hope he gets the least amount of time

            ​​i feel bad for sam, i don’t think he’s a threat to society. only thing is they may want to make an example out of him

            • @sc_griffith
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              98 months ago

              what skill set. WHAT SKILL SET

            • @sinedpick
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              88 months ago

              Ha, 2 hours later, comments are disabled.

          • David GerardMA
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            108 months ago

            lol it’s just a camera on the front of the building

      • @fnix
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        58 months ago
        1. THE BASILISK WILL COME FOR YOU ALL
    • Mii
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      128 months ago

      These clowns are so fucking incompetent at being evil geniuses that they need a document outlining their Evil Plan™ and not once think how that might be a stupid idea.

      • @selfMA
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        198 months ago

        at this point, multiple people involved in crypto have been famously caught with a crimes.txt file on their unencrypted desktop, in signal chats named some shit like financial crimes and real gamers clubhouse where they talk about the crimes and Fortnite they’re doing, or with toilet phones protected by ziplock bags with crime burner phone (with evidence of my crimes) written on the bag with a sharpie

        • Mii
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          128 months ago

          I suddenly feel like Hackerman because my PGP-encrypted file with Steam backup tokens is infinitely better secured than some crypto bro’s detailed confession of crimes that could land them jail for 50 years.

          • @selfMA
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            148 months ago

            I wonder how much of this is hubris from the cryptocurrency assholes consistently trying to confuse the public into associating their horseshit with general cryptography (especially with the crypto abbreviation for both) and in the process gaslighting themselves into thinking they’re cryptography and computer security experts

        • @blakestaceyMA
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          128 months ago

          This is why my crimes.txt file just contains the recipes that I really should not try making, like Jake Morgendorffer’s chile con cheesepuffs with fresh mint, and my actual crime plans are in… oh ho, I see what you did there, you clever jack-a-napes!