¿Qué?

Every single time I get naked.

It’s a chore.

Dry rape? Bro it’s a torture thing today

But don’t you know condoms burst at the sight of my shlong? It has nothing to do with the fact that the sight of naked me dries up a pussy quicker than a fucking hairdryer.

that’s what she said

Sometimes my car decides to play some radio before connecting to my phone. It’s an unfortunate side-effect of owning a not-too-nice car.

Radio DJs are little more than advertising agents nowadays. Or worse, wannabe entertainers.

Making car-pedestrian collisions safe is a ridiculous idea failed to doom from the start. Cars are big and hard, people are small and squishy.

I think the key is to prevent cars and people from coexisting as much as possible.

Oh it depends massively for me. One of my best (IMHO) short stories is 8k and was written over 10-12h in a day.

But that has to be a pretty special day.

On bad days I usually go into the negatives 😂

December

Haha, more like the entire next year.

Oh yeah. Some of my worst work is on those mega-inspired days where I sit for 10h and crank out 10000 words.

To this day I don’t know why I do that if I end up throwing most of it away.

Maybe it’s good to get bad plot out of the system.

And she absolutely kills it.

Or horny.

Domains were seized.

They are probably right, unfortunately.

I wouldn’t buy an automatic bike, coz I ride bikes for fun.

The daily get-to-work shitbox? I don’t want to babysit the gearbox, just do your thing while I chill to some tunes.

Also no one else being there.

Also being in my home.

Also getting to work in pants.

So I guess nothing, then 👌

The only reason you get that title, on either count, is that we decided to brexit.

(Using the word “decided” in the widest possible sense)

I just bought it the other day and went in blind with a friend. My god is it an insane game.

My friend isn’t even an engineer and he was talking about refactoring.

I’ll make an engineer out of him yet, you’ll see.

That’s what they always say, but no one considers the starting conditions.

Imagine you’re fighting a dead fat guy. Sounds easy, right? 300kg of dead weight just waiting for you to bury your fists in it.

But now imagine the fat guy starts next to you, standing. Can you stop 300kg of dead flabby dude from burying you? Didn’t think so. You’re gonna die a gruesome suffocating death under some guy’s quadruple chin because you didn’t consider the implications.

Come on. Be better, people.

I thought you fed on sovereignty like the rest of us?

You’re missing out, bruvva