The context of a dad talking to his daughter in a private text message. Its likely used as a phrase of endearment referring to his wife and daughter. He’s not speaking to about public women he doesn’t know.
Do you ever smile and call anyone you love and “asshole” or a “bitch” sarcastically when you are joking and happy with them when there is full respect and zero malice? Or perhaps more generally, if someone were to look into your private text messages with your parents could anything you say be taken out of context and be displayed as disrespectful?
No, I don’t even know how you could do that, and even if I did what the fuck does that have to do with pointlessly gendering people?
Since you edited yours I guess I’ll edit mine: first these text messages aren’t private that’s why we’re talking about them, second no I don’t disrespect people on purpose even privately, third what do my text messages have to do with pointlessly gendering people?
Then that’s why you don’t get it. Context is super important and there are people, a lot of people, of any gender or sexuality, that like to banter with people they are familiar with. Pointlessly gendering his daughter is the bloody point! Intentionally annoying people you are close with for kicks is fun. I’m not gonna say you aren’t fun but please let others in their private context have their kind of harmless fun too.
In the internet talking to the whole world I would agree, weird punching down. But in a close friends or healthy family environment? It’s fine.
If I were to have written such a thing I’d expect something like “yeah that’s why you men have no style, it’s all office shirts 🤮”. It’s just banter.
It’s possible to give somebody a good natured ribbing without using “women” as a pejorative term, and if you think that opinion makes me unfun then by all means go ahead and think that.
and if you think that opinion makes me unfun then by all means go ahead and think that.
Then I believe you are unfun or rather your sense of humor is limited. Alternately, I also accept that perhaps English isn’t your first language and much of humor is mixed with advance language understanding.
It’s possible to give somebody a good natured ribbing without using “women” as a pejorative term,
This feels like we’re deep into ThatstheJoke.jpg territory, but when a term that has an obvious pejorative usage exists, and it is used by a speaker you know doesn’t hold that pejorative opinion, then the joke gains another level of humor that the speaker is communicating the opinion they are stating can be considered jokingly dumb as though someone stupid that would use the term as a pejorative would hold that opinion. Its a method of communication that telegraphs the joking context to the recipient.
In this case it is extremely unlikely the Dad uses the “you women” ever as a pejorative. So the only reason he would use it is as a joke. He’s telling the daughter “hey, joke incoming using hyperbole of gender stereotypes here.”
I’m not gonna engage in all that chain but just to say that you not getting banter isn’t something to say you are not fun, that’s explicitly why I said it idk why you are reading more into what I said. You clearly enjoy other kind of humor and that’s fine, all I said is that doing an exercise of letting others enjoy this kind of humor in their consenting private (this was a private message) time wouldn’t hurt.
I’m still surprised, you haven’t heard of hyperbole as a comedy medium?
Never heard someone say “Let me teach you insult how to do this!*” To their friends? It’s the same kinda humor.
Anyway, you seem to not want to engage with it so I’ll stop, but please even if you don’t like it please understand from afar that there’s no malice. ❤️
I’m just seriously not understanding why hyperbole all of a sudden includes calling people “bitch“ or “asshole“ or using the word “Women“ as a pejorative. I’m honestly astonished how people have defended this. This has never been about malice, this has been about the fact that I said hey is it just me? and everybody decided to try mansplaining humor to me like I’m the weird one for thinking that calling my spouse or parents bitches isn’t banter. I’ve literally had people in this thread questioning my ability to hold a relationship over this. I don’t feel like I’m the one with the problem here honestly. I’m not the one who fucking hair triggered on somebody saying hey is it just me? And you at least have been a little calmer too but for real… this entire comment threat has been fucking insane.
What gets me with these posts is the unnecessary gendering of universal human behaviors THAT EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF GENDER DOES. Do we think moms are feeding babies in their nice work blouses? Women are doing crafts in beautiful sundresses? When I work on my car I promise I’m not doing it in my nice clothes. Life isn’t Instagram. Some people are just determined to see half the human species as not fully fleshed out people who do the exact same things they do.
I took it as “this is the thought process that you might not have thought of” as in neurons firing differently. It’s not disrespectful to say one group thinks differently.
I have ADHD and my mind gets put on a track I can’t control, so sometimes I’ll hear someone say something and stop listening to the conversation and just find out where my brain chooses to let me off. Sometimes I laugh at the stop, while my friends kept up normal conversation. They’re like “what?” And I have to just laugh and wave it off because it’s not worth explaining my train of thought. Or why I’m laughing at their uncles golf cart crash that lead to him being hospitalized because of bees.
People think differently and sometimes you explain it, sometimes you don’t. Honestly in this context, I think it puts it in a light mood like a joking mansplaining, when they’re really explaining their neurodivergence. Like I often do with my son “listen here you little shit…” When he asks obvious insulting questions about when I was young and lived in caves, or what I remember about sailing with Columbus.
I still feel like there’s a way to explain to somebody a thought process they might not have thought of without needlessly making it a gender thing. But again maybe it’s just me.
Is “you women” bothering anybody else or is it just me?
The context of a dad talking to his daughter in a private text message. Its likely used as a phrase of endearment referring to his wife and daughter. He’s not speaking to about public women he doesn’t know.
That context still bugs me. I have lesbian parents, I’d still never say to them ‘you women’.
Do you ever smile and call anyone you love and “asshole” or a “bitch” sarcastically when you are joking and happy with them when there is full respect and zero malice? Or perhaps more generally, if someone were to look into your private text messages with your parents could anything you say be taken out of context and be displayed as disrespectful?
No, I don’t even know how you could do that, and even if I did what the fuck does that have to do with pointlessly gendering people?
Since you edited yours I guess I’ll edit mine: first these text messages aren’t private that’s why we’re talking about them, second no I don’t disrespect people on purpose even privately, third what do my text messages have to do with pointlessly gendering people?
Then that’s why you don’t get it. Context is super important and there are people, a lot of people, of any gender or sexuality, that like to banter with people they are familiar with. Pointlessly gendering his daughter is the bloody point! Intentionally annoying people you are close with for kicks is fun. I’m not gonna say you aren’t fun but please let others in their private context have their kind of harmless fun too.
In the internet talking to the whole world I would agree, weird punching down. But in a close friends or healthy family environment? It’s fine.
If I were to have written such a thing I’d expect something like “yeah that’s why you men have no style, it’s all office shirts 🤮”. It’s just banter.
It’s possible to give somebody a good natured ribbing without using “women” as a pejorative term, and if you think that opinion makes me unfun then by all means go ahead and think that.
Then I believe you are unfun or rather your sense of humor is limited. Alternately, I also accept that perhaps English isn’t your first language and much of humor is mixed with advance language understanding.
This feels like we’re deep into ThatstheJoke.jpg territory, but when a term that has an obvious pejorative usage exists, and it is used by a speaker you know doesn’t hold that pejorative opinion, then the joke gains another level of humor that the speaker is communicating the opinion they are stating can be considered jokingly dumb as though someone stupid that would use the term as a pejorative would hold that opinion. Its a method of communication that telegraphs the joking context to the recipient.
In this case it is extremely unlikely the Dad uses the “you women” ever as a pejorative. So the only reason he would use it is as a joke. He’s telling the daughter “hey, joke incoming using hyperbole of gender stereotypes here.”
You still seem to be missing the point so I will just leave this here.
I’m not sure your contention that othering people is humorous makes you as fun as you think it does.
But it says it right on the box, “ribbed for her pleasure”. Can’t argue with facts!
I’m not gonna engage in all that chain but just to say that you not getting banter isn’t something to say you are not fun, that’s explicitly why I said it idk why you are reading more into what I said. You clearly enjoy other kind of humor and that’s fine, all I said is that doing an exercise of letting others enjoy this kind of humor in their consenting private (this was a private message) time wouldn’t hurt.
I’m still surprised, you haven’t heard of hyperbole as a comedy medium?
Never heard someone say “Let me teach you insult how to do this!*” To their friends? It’s the same kinda humor.
Anyway, you seem to not want to engage with it so I’ll stop, but please even if you don’t like it please understand from afar that there’s no malice. ❤️
I’m just seriously not understanding why hyperbole all of a sudden includes calling people “bitch“ or “asshole“ or using the word “Women“ as a pejorative. I’m honestly astonished how people have defended this. This has never been about malice, this has been about the fact that I said hey is it just me? and everybody decided to try mansplaining humor to me like I’m the weird one for thinking that calling my spouse or parents bitches isn’t banter. I’ve literally had people in this thread questioning my ability to hold a relationship over this. I don’t feel like I’m the one with the problem here honestly. I’m not the one who fucking hair triggered on somebody saying hey is it just me? And you at least have been a little calmer too but for real… this entire comment threat has been fucking insane.
Sounds like they hurt you. Do you need help.
You think my parents hurt me because I won’t pointlessly refer to them by their gender? What the fuck?
Yep. You remind me of a scientologist’s kid.
What gets me with these posts is the unnecessary gendering of universal human behaviors THAT EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF GENDER DOES. Do we think moms are feeding babies in their nice work blouses? Women are doing crafts in beautiful sundresses? When I work on my car I promise I’m not doing it in my nice clothes. Life isn’t Instagram. Some people are just determined to see half the human species as not fully fleshed out people who do the exact same things they do.
It did at first, until I kept reading and figured out the context.
I read the whole thing too, it still bothered me.
I took it as “this is the thought process that you might not have thought of” as in neurons firing differently. It’s not disrespectful to say one group thinks differently.
I have ADHD and my mind gets put on a track I can’t control, so sometimes I’ll hear someone say something and stop listening to the conversation and just find out where my brain chooses to let me off. Sometimes I laugh at the stop, while my friends kept up normal conversation. They’re like “what?” And I have to just laugh and wave it off because it’s not worth explaining my train of thought. Or why I’m laughing at their uncles golf cart crash that lead to him being hospitalized because of bees.
People think differently and sometimes you explain it, sometimes you don’t. Honestly in this context, I think it puts it in a light mood like a joking mansplaining, when they’re really explaining their neurodivergence. Like I often do with my son “listen here you little shit…” When he asks obvious insulting questions about when I was young and lived in caves, or what I remember about sailing with Columbus.
Clearly the intent isn’t misogyny.
I still feel like there’s a way to explain to somebody a thought process they might not have thought of without needlessly making it a gender thing. But again maybe it’s just me.