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I know a girl who thinks it goes. she’ll make you breakfast. she’ll make you toast. but she don’t use butter, and she don’t use cheese. she don’t use jelly or any of these
she uses vaseline
wtf…
are you certain she wasn’t trying to kill an abuser?
It’s a song.
from where? the section on how to murder a cheating bastard the stupid way?
It’s I believe “she don’t use jelly” by the flaming lips. But also Vaseline isn’t that toxic to eat (I would not recommend eating it) especially if you were only using it to butter toast.
It’s just a fun, silly song.
Fun fact, the inventor of Vaseline recommended eating it, and ate it every day.
Chesebrough lived to be 96 years old and was such a believer in Vaseline that he claimed to have eaten “more than a teaspoon” of it every day.[6][7]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Chesebrough?wprov=sfla1
Oh dear I love the stuff.
Skin LOVES it
MUCH better than aloe for sunburn
Lubricates and protects basically any metal, rubber or plastic
Stays slick when giving a massage
EDIT:
For the gents in the house, apply liberally to prevent any “sticking” throughout the day. Baby powder also works and is probably better for humid climates
I suggest Gold Bond Extra Strength for your junk fellow dick and ball havers out there, prevents chaffing, heals if it’s already there, and as was told to me when I was first educated about it by a buddy on my wrestling team, “feels like tiny little fairy’s are gently blowing on you balls”. 10/10 would recommend
Applying liberally to the orifice.
Not that orifice. Get your mind out of the gutter.
I meant a camera lens. uwu
To hide the wheels on the rig of your sci-fi hovering speeder, of course.
In that movie where that guy kisses his sister. 👉👈
In that movie where that guy kisses his sister. 👉👈
That’s the sequel.
Homecoming sluts 9?
um lip balm?
This has been a game changer for my chronically dry lips. It stays on long and makes your lips look great! Plus they’re healthier. Couldn’t recommend it enough.
Protecting industrial components from corrosion
It lets you use a snorkel mask with a mustache. (Clean the mask well though, it will destroy the plastic)
Waterproofing PCBs
Putting a layer just inside your nostrils to catch pollen and help with hayfever
Chapped lips
A thin layer on new car battery posts when you put a new one in to help protect from corrosion. Cheaper than the anti-corrosion spray and you probably have some lying around.
Favourite perfume is too expensive for everyday use? Spray a few pumps into a 150ml of vaseline, mix thoroughly, check if the smell is strong enough, add a few pumps if necessary.
Your perfume now lasts a LOT longer.
Apply the vaseline mixture to the usual spots (wrists, neck etc…)
Oooor, don’t use perfume. It’s suffocating to some of us.
I don’t but for those who do, this trick saves some bucks.
I don’t like being in the same room where people use hairspray, spray deodorants and such. I have to cough immediately.
When using perfume with vaseline the scent is lingering longer but is not as aggressive.
That’s a good point. It would be more controlled.
To quiet a squeaking hinge after misplacing my wd-40
Don’t use WD-40 for that. It’s not a lubricant, it’s a cleaner. Use silicone lube or oil instead.
Sealing a rubber gasket
- Holding mechanical parts together during assembly, for example some parts in automatic transmissions. It dissolves in the transmission fluid and doesn’t impair it’s performance or clog anything like greases could.
- Packing a replacement oil-pump with it to effectively pre-prime it so it pumps oil as soon as you start the engine it’s attached to.
