• @norimee@lemmy.world
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    2716 months ago

    24 y/o with a teaching job.

    No real income is what she has. Probably on top of a shitton student debt.

    • @qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website
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      6 months ago

      “no real bills” I’d believe…if the parent said she lived at home (no rent, and food provided), was on parents’ insurance (health, auto, etc.), had no student debt, and was walking distance to work.

      But given that her parent didn’t, I’d guess that isn’t the case. Turns out rent, food, transportation, and like you said, student debt, are all…what’s the word…real bills?

      • @vala@lemmy.world
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        46 months ago

        To a lot of people “serious bills” means credit card debt for shit they didn’t need.

    • @ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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      6 months ago

      By the description it sounds like she lives at home? Teachers start most places at $40k+ a year. If she doesn’t have any bills and she’s 24 and no longer wants to wear glasses or contacts, yeah. That’s on her.

      *Edit: Some of you disagree with my remarks about most teachers starting at over $40k. So in a below comment I provided facts and sources. The “teachers start most places at $40k+” is spot on.

  • @Dkarma@lemmy.world
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    1316 months ago

    This pervasive selfishness in older generations sickens and astounds me.

    Imagine not wanting to give your kids everything.

    I would forego food if I had to in order to help my kids see better.

        • @Maalus@lemmy.world
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          226 months ago

          LASIK isn’t some great cure. It has potential side effects and you can end up seeing worse than you did before.

          • I know I’m just one person, but it was one of the best decisions I ever made. I was almost legally blind without glasses/contacts, and just the stress of making sure my glasses prescription was up to date once I switched to contacts, making sure I packed glasses, contacts, extra contacts, solution, etc, for a trip, and losing 1 contact while at the store or something was instantly erased.

            I could read the street signs on the highway on the way home from the surgery. I hadn’t been able to do that unaided since I was probably 10.

            Do I need readers now that I’m older? Yep, just like they told me I would because everyone does because it’s a different issue that comes with aging. I wish they had a similar treatment for Presbyopia!!!

            Sure, everyone’s experience is different, but it almost was akin to a miracle for me. Life changing for sure.

          • @SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world
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            6 months ago

            Every procedure has that risk, even a routine vaccination or stitches, strange reason to pay for glasses and contacts forever.

            There are people who legitimately can’t get the surgery, but that’s obviously not who’s being discussed here.

            What’s the ratio on people being worse of for vision after? Cant make a claim like that and not provide some data.

            Glasses and contacts also don’t fix the issue and can lead to worse vision too, so arguably that’s non-factor in a discussion like this anyways.

            LASIK is the only chance to have a permanent fix. It’s a very important factor to consider, above and beyond the complications, that are also applicable to the glasses and contacts. I’ve not heard of many people’s vision getting better by their continual use.

            • @Maalus@lemmy.world
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              96 months ago

              No, what you are comparing to is a one in a million. Lasik has a rather large complication rate with doctors lying about it and using “satisfaction rate” instead of actually counting complications. Basically people think “it’s worth it to have these problems”. But issues like dry eye, halos, glare, shitty night vision are extremely common. They’ll tell you shit like “serious complications are at 1%” when what they mean is 1% go basically blind - or unable to do daily activities like driving at night.

              https://www.fda.gov/medical-devices/lasik/lasik-quality-life-collaboration-project

              46% of participants who didn’t have visual problems before lasik, said they have at least one 3 months after the surgery. 30% had dry eye issues. Those aren’t vaccine numbers.

              • @spittingimage@lemmy.world
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                96 months ago

                with doctors lying about it

                The last person I spoke with who used those words was trying to convince me she could cure cancer with electricity.

              • @Trail@lemmy.world
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                66 months ago

                Three months after surgery is too early for such a conclusion. It is expected that you still have dry eyes and stuff like that for a larger period of time, around 6 months or so with daily eye drops. Your vision post surgery is also not 100% improved, and gets better for up to a year after, while your eyes and brain adjust.

                Source: my wife had it. Certainly worth it. Your link is not very relevant.

              • @SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world
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                6 months ago

                In October 2009, the FDA, the National Eye Institute (NEI), and the Department of Defense (DoD) launched the LASIK Quality of Life Collaboration Project (LQOLCP) to better understand the potential risk of severe problems that can result from LASIK. The project’s goal was to develop a tool for determining the percent of patients who develop difficulties performing usual activities following LASIK, and to identify predictors for those patients.

                The technology is leaps and bounds better than it was 15 years ago, got anything modern?

                And the risk of your eyes getting worse with glasses and contacts is worse than that, your eyes can’t get better without mechanical intervention, and glasses WILL deteriorate your vision further. It’s 100% with glasses and contacts.

                • @sudneo@lemm.ee
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                  66 months ago

                  glasses WILL deteriorate your vision further. It’s 100% with glasses and contacts.

                  Do you have anything to share on this? I am asking because I remember I specifically asked my eye doctor this question, and he said no. (I asked something like if there is any downside in wearing glasses always vs only when needed e.g., reading, watching TV etc.).

                  I am also wearing the same glasses for almost 13 years now.

        • @BassTurd@lemmy.world
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          116 months ago

          Really it’s the upfront cost. Over the last 20 years I can say confidently that I have not spent more on corrective lenses than I would have on LASIK, but I’m getting close. I had it priced out last year and it’s about $4500 for the procedure. I’m at a point in my life where I would feel comfortable taking on those payments now. I know growing up there was zero chance my parents could have made it happen for me, it we would have all been starving.

          • Bob Robertson IX
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            66 months ago

            I kept putting it off… I wanted it when I was 20 but couldn’t afford it. I still wanted it at 30, but didn’t want to spend the money. At 40 I finally had more than enough in my HSA to cover my annual deductable, so I scheduled it. And I’ve LOVED it! However, around 45 I noticed that my near sight isn’t as good as it has been. Now at 48 I’m realizing that I’ll soon need reading glasses.

            I still think it was worth it… but I REALLY wish I had done it in my 20s so I could have enjoyed going glasses free for all those years.

            • @BassTurd@lemmy.world
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              46 months ago

              It’s on my shortlist of things to do and has always been a goal since my teenage years. I’m tired of dealing with lenses.

            • @proudblond@lemmy.world
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              26 months ago

              I mean, that’s a pretty good run. I’ve never had to wear glasses but now at 41 I need readers when my eyes are tired, and when they’re not they’re working harder for clarity than they ever had to before. I said something to my dad about it a couple years ago as I was first noticing the change and he said, “How old are you? Ah yeah, that’s about the age.” (Yes my dad had to check how old I was. 🙄)

        • @ohwhatfollyisman@lemmy.world
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          106 months ago

          LASIK procedures are “permanent”, at best, till the patient’s mid-40s. one source.

          Pay once or pay multiple times a year?

          no glasses wearers pay “multiple times a year” for new spectacles and lenses. the frequency does go up to once in two years or once a year after the mid-40s because of presbyopia, but that expense would be incurred anyway whether one gets a LASIK procedure done or not.

          • @SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world
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            56 months ago

            From your own link?

            LASIK eye surgery may mean no more corrective lenses. But it’s not right for everybody. Learn whether you’re a good candidate and what to consider as you weigh your decision.

            And maybe read the information on the over 40, it says laser is a solution to that, it says nothing about it still happening with laser, I think you are conflating issues.

            • @ohwhatfollyisman@lemmy.world
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              66 months ago

              do take the time to read the full article. particularly the section titled “LASIK vs. Reading Glasses”.

              separately, my cohorts and I are in the mid-40s and have undergone LASIK evaluation. the unanimous consensus given each of us is that we will have to undergo the procedure again and again as our eyes age. that we will have to fall back on glasses.

              i speak from personal experience on this topic.

        • @vala@lemmy.world
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          16 months ago

          You can get glasses for like $20 online. The ones at the optometrist are expensive because of insurance.

      • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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        166 months ago

        An elective surgery you call it, an investment in their vision, I call it. Not everyone has vision as part of their insurance, and contacts/glasses/exams can get expensive without (or even with, depending on the policy). Viewed in that way, LASIK can definitely be seen as an investment.

        • @MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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          56 months ago

          I mean, lasik comes with issues down the road if you go for the cheaper procedures, and even the good ones if you have complications.

          If the question is money, adding risk is often not the wisest of decisions…

          • @SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world
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            6 months ago

            The same can be said for glasses and contacts too. So you have a pay once and done, or a pay forever with the same potential issues. Very few people’s vision ever get better from continual glass contact use, but it can get better permanently from lasik.

      • @JovialMicrobial@lemm.ee
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        26 months ago

        It’s not like she’s asking for breast implants or liposuction(or something else that is not reconstructive in nature). It’s lasik, and it’ll help her quality of life, no more worrying about breaking her glasses or losing contacts.

        We dont know if she works in special ed where getting hit in the face could be a normal occurance for her. Maybe she struggles with contacts. Either way there are a lot of reasons for someone to want to go that route.

        Also, comparing lasik to something like nonreconstructive cosmetic surgery is disingenuous. One is completely for aesthetics, the other affects function.

      • JustEnoughDucks
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        16 months ago

        Would you forego getting a 3rd car or building an addition on your home or half of your yearly retirement investment so your kid wouldn’t have to spend too much money every few years on glasses?

        That is the biggest chance of what actually would be the situation.

    • @Clent@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      This isn’t a generational problem. It exists across all generations. Looks more like narcissism

      • @acockworkorange@mander.xyz
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        16 months ago

        Baby boomers were called “the me generation” by their predecessors before being called baby boomers. Sure, there are selfishness and narcissism at any period. But when everybody notices a trend, it’s hard to say they’re just like everyone else.

    • burgersc12
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      56 months ago

      Dirty commie kid, he should pay for food/shelter/happiness with labor /s

    • @Kalysta@lemm.ee
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      16 months ago

      I believe it’s because they’re all brain damaged due to lead poisoning from leaded gasoline that was widely used in their formative years.

    • @Kalysta@lemm.ee
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      16 months ago

      I believe it’s because they’re all brain damaged due to lead poisoning from leaded gasoline that was widely used in their formative years.

  • fatboy93
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    676 months ago

    The fuck does no real bills mean? Does eating, rent and gas/insurance not count as real bill?

      • fatboy93
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        66 months ago

        I assumed that they might be referring to either pets or kids in her class at school. Don’t teachers have to pay for stuff out of pocket a lot of times?

        • @rothaine@lemm.ee
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          16 months ago

          Don’t teachers have to pay for stuff out of pocket a lot of times?

          Yep. But at least you can claim that on your taxes! Only up to $300 per year though.

          (Spoiler alert: it’s always more than $300 a year)

      • Bob
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        56 months ago

        Stranger still: “no real kid(s)”.

    • @bitchkat@lemmy.world
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      116 months ago

      I just assumed she lived at home a d mom and dad paid for her car, insurance and cell phone. If she’s lucky, they also paid for college.

    • AItoothbrush
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      96 months ago

      You know what, i kinda agree. Eating, rent, transport, etc shouldnt be real bills. A teacher 100% should be able to pay for those easily.

  • @trumpetmouth@lemmy.world
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    546 months ago

    Dammit Mom, my 56 imaginary kids cost me nearly my ENTIRE paycheck! Have some sympathy.

    But for real, what is “real kids?”

    • @yuri@pawb.social
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      296 months ago

      because she’s a teacher she probably pays out of pocket for school/project supplies. i’ve known a good few teachers, and refereeing to students as sort-of surrogate children is very common. i’d put my money on the mom hassling the daughter about not yet having kids, and the daughter saying something like “i already have kids!” and this idiot is still bitter about it because she feels she is OWED grandchildren.

      i’m making a LOT of assumptions here, but like i said i WOULD put money on it. you hear enough firsthand stories and you start making these sort of assumptions.

      • @djsoren19@yiffit.net
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        66 months ago

        Yeah, I’ve met so, so many of these kinds of parents through my job, and you can reliably predict their behavior just by wondering “what’s the most selfish and entitled action they could take here?”

  • Queen HawlSera
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    6 months ago
    1. Teaching is a real job, probably one of the hardest
    2. Your daughter is fucking blind, and you’re laughing at her? You are slime
    • @keyez@lemmy.world
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      246 months ago

      Probably has a pet or two and doesn’t want any “real” kids so they don’t end up acting like their parents…

    • April (She/Her)
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      106 months ago

      My fifth grade teacher never had any kids, and considered us as her children. Maybe something like that is what she is referring to?

  • @Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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    326 months ago

    It wouldn’t occur to me to broadcast this to others on the internet, especially with personal details, even for a random solicitor, let alone a family member, let alone my own child.

    And since the kid didn’t anticipate the public ridicule, it may very well be the first time they ever asked for this kind of help. What an awful way to learn your parent considers you little more than an expendable prop in their social life.

    In nature, some species prey upon their young. We usually understand this as an evolutionary mechanism, to ensure only the strongest offspring survive. With that in mind, if your parent behaves like this, consider that they may no longer be your caregiver, and it may be time for you to decide what it takes to be the offspring that survives.

      • @Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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        66 months ago

        Social Darwinism disgusts me…

        Same, but I picked this illustration for a reason.

        Abusive parents often use essentialist language to keep their children bound with obligation and guilt. Vulnerability to that rhetoric tends to be associated with notions of “natural law,” so I suspect a natural metaphor has a better chance of resonating with those that need to hear it.

    • bufalo1973
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      76 months ago

      And when the time comes that shitty person will ask “why she doesn’t love me? Why she threw me to this garbage asylum?” without understanding it.

      • @Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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        46 months ago

        And only because at some point they decided to stop hearing anyone who disagreed. It’s not just their kids who stop talking to them. Eventually everyone figures it out, and this type of person ends up pretty isolated later in life.

    • @SolOrion@sh.itjust.works
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      36 months ago

      It wouldn’t occur to me to broadcast this to others on the internet, especially with personal details, even for a random solicitor, let alone a family member, let alone my own child.

      That enrages me. I don’t understand why people feel the need to air their dirty laundry on social media. Keep that shit to yourself, the relevant parties, and your therapist.

      • @Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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        16 months ago

        For some reason, some folks think they can make themselves look better by making everyone around them look worse.

    • @DillyDaily@lemmy.world
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      36 months ago

      I’m hoping she doesn’t teach highschoolers. If her students cought wind of this post and worked out it was about their teacher, classroom management goes out the window.

    • @uienia@lemmy.world
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      76 months ago

      Fuck of with that stupid generationism. This is narcissism, a mental illness which exists in people of all ages.

      Generationism is something that is made up to make people forget about the actual structural problems in society.

  • Chris Lowles
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    316 months ago

    “No one has audacity like the people you raised” proceeds to post about it to potentially millions of people, you know like people without audacity do.

  • @bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    316 months ago

    Dude this is like every post on the estranged parents sub on reddit… they really are oblivious to the fact that their kids have good reasons to hate them

  • @Taleya@aussie.zone
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    6 months ago

    Someone tell them “i think i raised an entitled shit” isn’t the pwn they think it is

      • Yep! You just get a prescription from the eye doctor and enter the values on the site. 20 bucks later and boom you have some very reliable and inexpensive glasses. I’ve been using these guys for years and had basically zero issues.

      • ɠισƚԋҽϝʅσɯ
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        26 months ago

        Yep, also need your pupillary distance. i havent gotten an exam in so long i cant remember if thats included in the prescript. Luckily my eyesight hasnt gotten worse (yet).

        Wearing my 26 dollar photochromic zennis for this comment. Been using zenni glasses for the better part of a decade.

        • @Mushroomm@sh.itjust.works
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          26 months ago

          It’s not usually but you can print out the little gauge thing or use their in browser tool if you have a Webcam and don’t mind your face being scanned by a discount glasses company in the decade of machine learning we’re about to go through

      • @PancakeBrock@lemmy.zip
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        26 months ago

        I got a pair of prescription glasses and sun glasses from Payne glasses for $80. I stopped wearing contacts a few years ago, and I work outside. I really missed having sun glasses.

    • @Showroom7561@lemmy.ca
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      56 months ago

      From what I remember, $20 gets you a premium pair! I was getting glasses from Zenni and others for <$10.

      If the daughter is looking at Lasik, it’s not out of necessity.

  • plz1
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    226 months ago

    My daughter that is under-paid because she’s a teacher and they are all under-paid is asking me for financial help, and I’m a scumbag outing her for trying to have a better quality of life with a medical procedure early in her working career.

    Man, I hate the internet sometimes…