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- Lord Denethor, Your son has returned.
- Who, Boromir?
- No the other one.
- Fuck him.
Presumably Éowyn eventually did.
I’d phrase that slightly differently. “One does not simply walk into FUCKING MORDOR!”
That is better. I updated
“One does not simply fuck into Mordor!”
Okay if we’re changing the movies, I’m going to say it again. Put Bombadil back in.
Then, he’s all “Eldest, that’s what I am… Tom remembers the first raindrop and the first acorn… he knew the dark under the stars when it was fearless – before the Dark Lord came from Outside.”
And then Pippin can whisper “what the fuck”.
Winner
That was probably the first take.
A BLACK ARROW suddenly THUDS into BOROMIR'S chest.
BOROMIR
Fuck me, not again.This but he drops character and is just Sean bean
Wait. There’s a difference?
“Fuck off you fools!”
I would also accept “Fly, you fucks!”
Fuck of a Took!
“Poh-tah-toes… Boil em, fuck em, put em in a stew?”
tay*
Let’s call the whole thing off.
Aragorn: “Gentlemen, we do not stop 'til nightfall.”
Pippin: “What about breakfast?”
Aragorn: “You’ve already had it.”
Pippin: “We’ve had one, yes. What about second breakfast?”
Merry: “I don’t think he knows about second breakfast, Pip.”
Pippin: “What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn’t he?”
Aragorn: “Shut the fuck up”
A "What the fuck"belongs after Bilbo does the face.
Ew. Gollum’s sloppy seconds? 🤢
3 f-bombs. One per movie.
The last one has to go to Gollum as he falls down into the lava.
That would be a Fuck Yeah
Well there are 3 movies, so technically you would get 1 fuck (or fuck equivalent) per movie. Everyone wants the Fuck to be funny, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it should be.
I think for Fellowship I would put it at the Balrog arriving and uttered by Gandalf, he’s the only person who understands the situation and a fuck would punctuate the seriousness of the situation.
For The Two Towers I think I’d make it happy/exasperated and give it to Aragorn as the Elves of Rivendell arrive (not book accurate, but also not the question).
For Return of the King I think it kinda has to go to Sam as he is reacting to Frodo crashing out. “Fuck, Mr. Frodo we’ve got to go on.”
Just one take, not the best or the last.
Return of the King, it should be when Gandalf gets his staff shattered by the witch king. Like an extremely disappointed kind of “fuck”
The fellowship of the ring: Gimli could quietly say “fuck…” as he hears the drums in the deep.
The two towers: Aragorn could yell it as he kicks the helmet.
The return of the king: perhaps when Sam fights the spider? Or maybe one of the sailors as the undead army runs towards them across the water.
Those would be my suggestions, though I think the movies are better off without it of course.
I was thinking Fellowship right when they start hearing the Balrog. Gandalf says quietly, with his head still half-bowed, “fuck.”
When the DMPC is anxious, the party should be puckering all angles.
Definitely Aragorn right after kicking the helmet
Council of Elrond - the last of the participants are trickling in as it’s about to start: slightly in the background, you see Samuel L Jackson approach in full Jedi garb, but is stopped by a guard. You can’t hear anything they’re saying, as the camera is still focused on the actual event that’s now kicking off, but you can see an increasingly heated exchange between Jackson and the guard, with Jackson producing a paper document and pointing to it, then to the council. The guard takes the paper and begins reading it as Jackson crosses his arms and waits in an annoyed ‘hurry up’ pose. The guard then shows the document to Jackson while pointing to a specific word, then points back to the council while explaining something, still unheard.
Jackson snatches the document, angrily stomps, and a barely audible “mother fucker!!” is heard by the audience as he turns around and storms away.
That’s in the extended extended version.
“We grant you the rank of Master, but not a position on this Council.”
“Fucking karma!”
Is that before or after he joins The Rohirrim in the Riddemark to finally chase those mofuggin’ snakes offa the mofuggin’ plain", though?
